It’s Halloween season (apparently in mid-August) at the Magic Kingdom! Which means it’s time for Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party! I’ve been going to these parties since I was a college man, and I’ve picked up some tips and tricks throughout the years to make my time better. So with this being my way of communicating information with people, I’m going to pass on my do’s and don’ts for taking on Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party:
Do: Get As Much Candy As Possible
What’s Halloween without getting enough candy to cause you to either puke or rack up your dentist bill? So get as much candy as possible. And if your bag gets too full, they have extra bags. So you can get more candy!
Don’t: Trick Or Treat at Quick Service Food Counters
Picture this. You’re at Pecos Bill’s. You go to the counter. You say trick or treat. They give you a burger. You put said burger in your bag. Now all your candy is covered in burger grease. And burger grease flavored Starburst is the second worse flavor (behind Orange). Don’t do it!
Do: Get in Line Early for Jack Skellington with Sally, Seven Dwarves and/or Moana
These character meet and greets have lines that span into the hour(s) mark to meet. And they even start meeting before the party starts. So get in line ASAP as possible to get their meet and greets out of the way. And if you’re really good at mitosis, then knock a few of these out at once.
Don’t: Trick Or Treat at the Haunted Mansion
Picture this. You go to the Haunted Mansion. You go right to the front door and say trick or treat. You had to jump the fence just to get there, thus trespassing. You get kicked out of the Magic Kingdom for trespassing. And now you can’t attend MNSSHP again. Don’t do it.
Do: Go See The Second Parade
On top of the second parade being less busy than the first one, my buddy Dave is a cowboy in the second parade. So say hi to him if you see him. He’ll be the one dressed like a cowboy.
Don’t: Light the Black Flame Candle on a Full Moon on All Hallows’ Eve (But Only if You’re a Virgin)
Unless you are okay with summoning Bette Middler, Peggy Hill and a horse to try and murder all the children, don’t light any candles if you’ve never played, “Hide the Pickle.” Unless…
Do: Light the Black Flame Candle on a Full Moon on All Hallows’ Eve (But Only if You ARE NOT a Virgin)
If you have hid a pickle at least once, light all the candles you want. You’re not going to summon any crazy murder witches.
Don’t: Ask For Christmas Cookies and Hot Cocoa
You’re a few months too early for that request. Try again in November.
Do: Dress Up (As Long As It’s Appropriate)
Dressing up is my favorite thing to do! One time I went as Waldo and photobombed people. And I actually found my picture in some strangers Instagram. Crazy how life happens. Or that one time I went with my girlfriend, my best friend and her fiancé and we dressed like my best friend’s fiancé because, “He doesn’t dress up.” Anyways, wear a costume. It’s Halloween.
Don’t: Trick or Treat at a Character Meet and Greet
Picture this. You go to meet Tiana. You say Trick or Treat. She pours gumbo in your bag. The bag melts because you just had a hot soup poured in a plastic bag. Now your candy is all melted! And on the floor! And trust me, from experience, soup/melted candy and plastic stains are difficult to remove from carpet. Just don’t do it.
And those are my tips and tricks for Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party. Feel free to pass these along to all or your friends. And above all. Have a Happy Halloween!